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Heart of Mud and Spit (A Psalm)

This poem, by Sam Kittrell, is the first in a series we’re calling “Psalms, Proverbs, and Parables.” The goal is to adopt the format of the biblical psalms (poems and songs to God), proverbs (pithy sayings, mostly about wisdom and foolishness), and parables (images and stories that convey deeper truths) as we wrestle with God and life and death and beauty here in the 21st Century. To be clear, we are not suggesting that our words could be comparable to Holy Scripture. But there’s a reason David spoke in psalms, Solomon in proverbs, and Jesus in parables. Whenever we try to understand something really profound, we are forced into the world of stories and songs. If a picture says a thousand words, a good poem, proverb or parable says a million. 

— Ross

 

Heart of Mud & Spit (A Psalm)

 

As incense burned by ghosts,

The scent of death

Surrounds me

 

As the wake of some great ship,

The tide of chaos

Trails me

 

My heart cries out

To the Lord always

But I remain 

Expressionless.

 

My soul writhes,

My spirit grieves,

But my outer wall remains

Unfazed.

 

Lord, let me feel.

Damn this indifference.

 

Give me a heart of mud and spit

And open my eyes

 

Give me a heart of bread and fish

And feed my soul five thousand times

 

Give me a heart of fine perfume

And pour me out upon your feet

 

Raise this Lazarus heart

Once more

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